You may or may not have noticed that it has been 3 weeks since my last blog post. I'm not going to make up an excuse or a reason for my lack of posts because that's just not what I'm about, from the very first day that I set up my blog I said that I would be nothing but honest with all of my readers be it regards the use of products/services, or simply just letting you in on my day to day life which is what I'm just about to do.
If I had one euro for every time someone said to me "you're such a confident young girl, I'd do anything to have your confidence" I would be a pretty rich woman by now. I Honestly don't know where people get the idea of me being an extremely strong,confident girl from because in fact, I am the complete opposite!! Right up to 5th year in school I used to take part in all the school musicals playing leading roles in 3rd year 4th year and 5th year with not one ounce of bother, the crowds never bothered me, the whole standing up and singing in front of 300 odd people literally didn't phase me one single bit.A short while after the school musical of 5th year, which was 2014 it was like a switch just went off inside my head and all of a sudden i was hit with the worse case of anxiety.
For a while I actually didn't know what was going on. Every time I used to get a panic attack I fully blown thought that I wasn't going to make it out alive. Sounds crazy right? It literally is the most bizarre feeling in the world. I have to admit though,from 5th year right through to the end of 6th year was possibly the worst period of time in my whole life. The palpitations,shortness of breath,chest pains etc were at their all time highest, but of course the stress and pressure of the big L.C played a vital role in those episode too.
The reason I think I get panic attacks so frequent is because I'm the worlds biggest worrier. I literally worry about everyone and everything and realistically speaking it gets me absolutely nowhere, only outside in the fresh air with my hands above my head gasping for some air not a pretty image,right? Thankfully I've managed to find ways to keep my anxiety somewhat at bay, of course they're times when you simply cannot do anything to avoid getting an attack but majority of the time I just get a bit of fresh air (if possible), Take a deep breathe, a drop or 2 of rescue remedy and I have
finally learned how to talk myself out of getting a fully blown panic attack.
By now you're probably wondering what is the point of this blog post? Realistically I think its pretty self explanatory. Quite a lot has happen and changed in the past month, including loosing one of of my close childhood friends which literally shattered my heart into a thousand pieces as heaven has gained the most beautiful angel of all. I really do think the past 4 weeks has put life into perspective for me though.I can either stay in my comfort zone and leave my anxiety define me and let it stop me from achieving all of the things I want to achieve or I get up and get on with life and fight through the anxiety and continue to be successful. I've basically took the past month off from writing full blog posts because my head literally just wasnt in and im not one for doing something for the sake of it. I either give it my all or I don't do it all and I can promise each and every one of you that this time I'm back with a bang. I'm extremely fortunate to have gotten some amazing opportunities so early in my career and at such a young age and for quite a while I've been taking it all for granted, but that stops right here,because what if everything I have ever wanted is on the other side of fear?
This time 3 weeks, my blog will be turning one year old, which I literally cannot comprehend, time is going by way to fast and I think thats one of the Main reasons that I'm going to push myself even more and fight through the fear that I live with on a daily basis. As you can imagine there has been plenty of ups and downs over the past year but thankfully, theres been a lot more ups than downs and I'm not ready to give up something that I'm so passionate about just because I've been feeling down with the past month. I have so much to look forward to and more importantly I have so much to be grateful for since starting my blog in April 2016. I have so much exciting things in the pipeline and I can't wait to take each and everyone of you on the journey with me including my biggest meeting to date next Saturday!!
Lastly, I want to say a massive thanks to each and everyone of you who take time out of your day to read my blog posts and for all of your love and support. It means the absolute world to me and I will be forever grateful for all of the support that is shown to me on a daily basis. My motto from here on in is "Get up, Dress up, show up and most of all Never Give up". On that note, thats all for now. I hope you all have a great week.
Until next time.
Much Love,
Caoimhe x
No comments:
Post a Comment